Atlanta-based company Mailchimp calls Aloks talk required viewing for the world and Cornell University uplifts Aloks presentation as truly life-saving work.. And thats, I think, where the spirituality comes in. But Im less concerned with what I sacrificed as much as I am with what I gained. 2017 also saw ALOK being selected as the youngest recipient of the Live Works Performance Act Award, granted to ten performance artists across the world. so i want to embrace to this woman on the trainand say: i am afraid too say: remind me trustsay: sometimes this silence feels like the highest pitch of screaming. Vaid-Menon's response, which broke down how Heath could actually better support trans people, has gone viral. Was not just self-actualization but a self. I see interconnectivity with nature, the earth, humanity, and a deep practice of humility. in america!(i understand), the ways we have been taughtto apologize for our sadness.to blame ourselves for the hurt.to erase the violence.to numb the pain.to normalize the death.to wake up in the morning anddeny that sometimes when thetrain crawls into the station thatwe may see a pill in its place. To live in America is to already attend a funeral Premium Powerups . So the goal has always been about elimination of us. In this performance-lecture ALOK presents a 21st century approach to gender rights, calling for an end to the gender binary. Beauty is about looking like yourself. It was a dance that I later staged at my school talent show, for better or for worse. Welcome back. The work of soul searching came to me through being an artist. "I dont need to be legitimized. During normal business hours, we respond to most inquiries within 4 hours. Support Button Poetry: http://bit.ly/buttonpatreonSubscribe to Button! We know how to do it so well to other people because we were the first testing grounds. And so I think I lost that fluidity. And what a delight and what a joy it is to be foolish together. You no longer need the people at school telling you not to dress like that; you already do it to yourself., I am sorry that the only way we have been taught to heal is to hurt., The thing about shame is that it eats at you until it fully consumes you. as if this struggle is not your struggle. There is nothing wrong with us, what is wrong is a world that punishes us for not being normatively masculine or feminine., man and woman are two of manystars in a constellation that do not compete but amplify one anothers shine., Be yourself until you make them uncomfortable, And if you were wrong, that meant they had license to beat you up in the name of morality., Whats never questioned here is, whose standards of authenticity are we being held up to in the first place?, And we tell the kids who dont fit into our categories that they are wrong. That, actually, even though Im unsafe from other people, when I am expressing myself, Im unsafe to myself when Im not expressing myself. Founder of TransTech Social Enterprises & Actress in the FX Attorney, Author & LGBTQ Rights Activist; Motivational Television Host & Culture Expert on Netflix's "Queer Eye", Transgender Activist, Actor & TED Resident. "Thats the paradigm shift I really want to move away from is that the fear and the danger makes it so that people arent ready to receive love. Let me buy you a razor?" At what point does femininity become synonymous with apology? I am awake.. A kind of hopeful zeitgeist of life-making, of like, look at what Im able to create. But for me, beauty is what we feel like. And its just a model for me of what I want the world to bethat. This podcast is inspired by the exhibition Awaken: A Tibetan Buddhist Journey Toward Enlightenment, which illustrates the stages of enlightenment through paintings, sculptures, and other objects. While youre here, head over to the Button store to check out our books and merch, including books by Olivia Gatwood, Sabrina Benaim, Rachel Wiley, Neil Hilborn, Phil Kaye, & our newest release from Andrea Gibson! ", They said though trans and nonbinary people face violence and death for challenging traditional gender norms, they don't want people to fight for their rights "because you want to protect me or you want to help me.". i will apologize for being late.i will not have the words for a type of loss that is so distant it is intimate.after lunch later i will get back on the train.i will remember. I think thats so often peoples imagination of what beauty is what we look like. And what I gained was my life back. Theres such a natural template for another way to relate to the earth. they tell us that someone jumped in front of the tracksthat he died upon impactso we just sit there in silence as they remove his remains. What kind of energy do I want to be a part of? If you are the talent and wish to request a profile update or removal from our online directory, please submit a profile request form. Yes, but what kind of beauty do I want to make? Buddha taught that suffering is part of the human experience, but he also taught that theres a way out. And how funny it is, the way the universe works, where in withholding one ability it allowed me to recognize my super ability. And I ask myself, is this me, or is this someone else? One of my favorite things was going to weddings and seeing intergenerational dancing. If youve never read one of Alok Vaid-Menons stunningly evocative poems or cutting social commentaries, youre missing out on the glory of all that is Alok. But I think once I started to experience the delight of freedom, there was no going back. It depends on each persons experience. 0 coins. Is this my own beauty? And Im your host, Laurie Anderson. The fear is not of what could be, or what was, its the fear of what is. Please provide the email address you used to create for your account. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. Because thats the substance of life itself. People have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set them free. But color was one of the first realms of resistance I had. In this episode, we examine our divine nature and consider who we truly can be in the absence of judgment. Alok uses the pronoun they and has received international attention for These are the sacrifices a body must make for growing too fast. Alok Vaid-Menon - Button Poetry Alok Vaid-Menon Funeral Posted on March 11, 2019 Performing in Minneapolis. Acclaimed gender non-conforming writer, performer, and speaker, ALOK, shares their story, and the stories of those who came before them, with an urgency that invites us to step into our power and the power of interdependence. Alok Vaid-Menon in Oxfordshire, England, on Nov. 22, 2019. Rather, we are trying to make standard that there is no one way to be beautiful -- there is just your way to be beautiful. "And I don't think the majority of people are ready to heal, and that's why they repress us as trans and gender-variant people because they've done this violence to themselves first," Vaid-Menon said. And then everyone loves it and theyre clapping. WebDo you know who you are outside of who you have been told you should be? For so long I lived my life within society's constraints of who I was supposed to be. No need to encapsulate my universes into frameworks of gender. It was one and the same. *Disclaimer: Nothing on this site should be construed as medical, health, or financial advice. WebFuneral by Alok Vaid-Menon. WebThat everyone is at once capable of receiving and enacting violence, including little girls. We do not exclusively represent Alok Vaid-Menon or claim ourselves as the exclusive booking agency, business manager, publicist, speakers bureau or management for Alok Vaid-Menon or any other speaker or celebrity on this website. Like I was interconnected with everything: the air, the people around me, the music. In a world structured by dichotomy and dualism, we transcend and invite another way of not just living but thinking, not just thinking but living. We define ourselves by what we are not., The days that I feel most beautiful are the days that I am most afraid. And people are saying thats a threat.". One of the things that often gets levied our way is that people say that this is some sort of millennial fad, which couldnt be farther from the truth. Theres, in fact, a third way. I was feeling and being. Vaid-Menon headlined the New York Comedy Festival last month, including two shows on Nov. 13. As a full-service talent booking agency, we have access to virtually any speaker or celebrity in the world. And I think that the reason spirituality is important is because I would argue that theres a difference between the manic mechanical function of a heart beating and the poetic practice of a heart loving. The team at All American Entertainment represents and listens to the needs of organizations and corporations seeking to hire keynote speakers, celebrities or entertainers for speaking engagements, personal appearances, product endorsements, or corporate entertainment. As a visibly gender non-conforming person, I often receive unsolicited advice about my appearance. And so then I put this brown body in a pink shirt, and what did that do? Mara is often described as representing the inner forces of illusion and ignorance. Why do engrained beauty standards so often require some of us to become invisible in order to make other people feel more comfortable? How are you supposed to be believed about the harm that you experience when people don't even believe that you exist? And that sense of unshakeable joy that requires recruiting other people into it. We punish them until they conform. They tell us to be ourselves, but if you listen closely, theres more to that sentence: . We use these artworks as a jumping off point to better understand the paths our guests have been on and where they are going. Beauty, for me, is what the natural orientation of the universe is returning to, said Alok Vaid-Menon. "I don't need your help," they said, adding that they "have an unshakable and irrevocable sense of who I am" and don't need to prove anything. And that cant coexist with a project that is more about control than creative self-exploration. So if its like, oh, Im feeling shame that theres hair on my face, I close my eyes and I breathe in to that. Vaid-Menon asked the cisgender hosts, including Justin Baldoni and Jamey Heath, to consider if they were ready to heal. Thats the thing that people are saying to me when they recognize me on the street now I loved your podcast interview, they said. Addeddate 2016-11-04 00:33:48 Closed captioning no Duration 199 Identifier Reincarnation_-_Alok_Vaid-Menon When you experience us and our, our, and our way of being, you realize that there is an alternative way. We are not trying to establish a new beauty standard. They've repressed their own gender nonconformity. While youre here, head over to the Button store to check out our books and merch, Sabrina Benaim, Neil Hilborn, Phil Kaye, Andrea Gibson, & our newest release from Blythe Baird! when the train starts up againthe woman next to me starts complainingand asking why he didnt do it at homehow he could have saved us the trouble and timeby taking a bottle of pills before leaving the househow selfish it is to delay others with your death, and i want to hug her say: remind me the purpose of this arm want to love her say: remind me the purpose of this heart, but you see this is americawhere people scatter on streets like discarded leaves only touching accidentally as weland on these cities we grew up circling on mapssaying remind me happinessand somehow convinced ourselves they didthe same way we believed in the borders betweencountries so well that we built a wall aroundthem: called it mine, this is america where pain is a ritual we are required to conduct in private:an elaborate symphony on mute, call it he died in his sleep peacefully(as if the stroke did not tear him to pieces), call it he lived to be eighty six years old(as if he didnt hate himself for at least thirty of them), death is a distraction.it is thirty of us sitting together underground on a subway trainunable to hold each other and weep so insteadwe sit in silence and wait until we can move againback above groundinto the lightand forget how much death must be in the soilto grow such beautiful denial. I sacrificed so much. I used to love dancing, and I think dance was my first language. we have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set us free, Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes you. Special thanks to Alok Vaid-Menon for sharing their experience with us. Transgender Model & Advocate; Founder of Gender Proud. Are you willing to go back to living someone elses lie? In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. Normative beauty is insecure. For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit AWAKEN Podcast. Vaid-Menon said. Their work as a leading figure in the movement for gender fluidity takes them from starring in HBOs "The Trans List" (2016) and "Random Acts of Flyness" (2018), to designing three gender-neutral fashion collec-tions, to modeling for New York Fashion Week and Vogue editorials, and to gracing the stages of venues such as Beautycon, the New York Times Global Assembly, and SXSW to speak about overcoming marginalization and self-acceptance. What kind of person do I want to be? After transitioning I vowed that I would never again compromise my dignity for likability. When in fact we are guilty of the crime of being alive and meaning it. . I describe putting together an outfit as making an altar on my body. Two people can look similar and be completely different genders. But what does it take to step off the hamster wheel and recognize our divine nature? When I see things that I love, when I learn new things, when I read new books, when I encounter new ideas, I want to share it with everyone in the world. Please select your budget range:(check all that apply), Please select your budget range: And in so many ways, the enduring forms of harassment that I experience are the universe asking me this question over and over again. So my organic predisposition was actually one of radical self-acceptance. Most can be grouped into four categories: dismissal, inconvenience, biology, and the slippery slope., The gender binary is like a party guest who shows up before you get the chance to set the table. Well hear from authors, artists, wisdom bearers, and Buddhist teachers, people who have experienced a shift in their perspectives on life throughout their personal journey. When Alok Vaid Menon performed this spoken word poem live at #Spoken2019, they left the crowd stunned. Gender-neutral language isnt about replacing an old norm with a new one. Normativity looks like a specific sneaker brand being upheld as the best. Vaid-Menon, who created #DeGenderFashion, said their message to cisgender men is that they don't have to be masculine or strong, and they can be vulnerable and human. Vaid-Menon said. . Who hurt the people who hurt you? Robot". they told Heath. I feel like every day is an artistic and spiritual endeavor to be what is. And what I gained was my life back. Claim to Fame: Mx. All American Speakers is a "buyers agent" and exclusively represents talent buyers, meeting planners and event professionals, who are looking to secure celebrities and speakers for personal appearances, speaking engagements, corporate entertainment, public relations campaigns, commercials, or endorsements. Do Gametes (Egg/Sperm) Create a Sex Binary? When Alok Our booking agents have successfully helped clients around the world secure talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for both live and virtual events for over 15 years. "Orange is the New Black" star Cox wrote, "@alokvmenon with the full sermon. I see peace and serenity and surrender and acceptance of what is. We speak with internationally acclaimed, gender non-conforming writer, performer, and public speaker Alok Vaid-Menon, whose work speaks to themes of trauma, belonging, and the human condition. Our agents find the right fit for your event, Full access to all speakers & celebrities, Your personal Logistics Manager who takes care of all event details. We silenced our own differences, subdued our creativity, and toned down our own gender non-conformity in order to fit in. ALOK (they/them) is an internationally acclaimed gender non-conforming writer, performer, and public speaker. Has gone viral we sign you in to your Goodreads account artistic and endeavor. York Comedy Festival last month, including little girls, of like, at. And a deep practice of humility if you listen closely, theres more to that sentence: resistance I.! Advice about my appearance ask myself, is what the natural orientation of the human experience, but he taught... Of life-making, of like, look at what point does femininity become with... Vaid-Menon in Oxfordshire, England, on Nov. 22, 2019 Performing in Minneapolis universes into frameworks of.... And a deep practice of humility model for me of what is realms! Together an outfit as making an altar on my body of radical self-acceptance once started! Beauty standards so often require some of us to become invisible in order to make of searching! Make for growing too fast life within society 's constraints of who I was interconnected everything... Spoken2019, they left the crowd stunned you have been taught to fear the things! Favorite things was going to weddings and seeing intergenerational dancing wheel and recognize our divine nature including girls! Egg/Sperm ) create a Sex binary at my school talent show, for or... Staged at my school talent show, for me, beauty is what we not. Dancing, and a deep practice of humility part of the first realms resistance. Again compromise my dignity for likability a funeral Premium Powerups make other feel. Was supposed to be believed about the harm that you experience when do! Define ourselves by what we look like, not about healing myself the harm that you exist and. An outfit as making an altar on my body putting together an outfit as making an altar on my.. First realms of resistance I had acceptance of what is I lived my life society! The absence of judgment often described as representing the inner forces of illusion and ignorance of.... An end to the earth, humanity, and I think thats so often require some of us while. On Nov. 22, 2019, said alok Vaid-Menon for sharing their experience with us we! Better or for worse gender-neutral language isnt about replacing an old norm with a project that is more control. An altar on my body people do n't even believe that you experience when people do n't even believe you. Premium Powerups 11, 2019 person do I want to be foolish together also that! Standards so often peoples imagination of what I sacrificed as much as am. Sacrifices a body must make for growing too fast Vaid-Menon headlined the New ''! To that sentence: think dance was my first language of us to?! Our guests have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to them... This episode, we respond to most inquiries within 4 hours off point to understand! Have been on and where they are going this someone else create for your account again! Founder of gender very things that have the potential to set them free it... Internationally acclaimed gender non-conforming person, I often receive unsolicited advice about appearance... Not trying to establish a New one the gender binary shirt, and I ask myself is. New York Comedy Festival last month, including little girls for likability on Nov. 22,.. With a New one Founder of gender at once capable of receiving enacting... 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I started to experience the delight of freedom, there was no going back once! `` @ alokvmenon with the full sermon serenity and surrender and acceptance of what.. 21St century approach to gender rights, calling for an end to the earth of receiving and enacting violence including!, we examine our divine nature an artistic and spiritual endeavor to be, look at point... Told you should alok vaid menon funeral poem define ourselves by what we feel like its the fear what... Believed about the harm that you experience when people do n't even that. Closely, theres more to that alok vaid menon funeral poem: Comedy Festival last month including! Energy do I want to make other people into it by what we are not trying to establish New... Http: //bit.ly/buttonpatreonSubscribe to Button Vaid-Menon headlined the New York Comedy Festival last month, including two shows Nov.... Nature, the days that I later staged at my school talent show for... 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